Writings


Original Works


BRULURE (2025)
I’LL BE SEEING YOU (2025)
WISH II (2025)
CINDERSTAR (2025)
BAIN (2025)
MARASCHINO (2025)
COSMIC TEA (2025)
WRITING (2025)
UNCOMFORTABLE VISION (2025)
HANGING UP THE MOON AND A STAR (2025)
CIGARETTE DAYDREAMS (2025)
DESTINED (2025)
POMME (2025)
STUPID PRIZES (2025)
GARISH (2025)
FLOAT / FLOWER (2025)
LAZY BALLOON (2025)
STARMOUTH (2025)
NO 59 (2025)
PARTS DIVIDED (2025)
I SHOULD NEVER HAVE LEFT THE GARDEN (2025)
JUST A WOBBLE (2025)
TWO NOTIFICATIONS (2025)
BLUBOT (2025)





Forms of Life


Before going to see this exhibit, I read some reviews in which some journalists felt placing Mondrian next to af Klint did her a disservice. Others felt it unfair to pit af Klint’s ‘fresh’ work next to Mondrian’s over-familiar, some thought the exhibition divisive because of ‘generational rifts’ in audience and Time Out, of course, spectacularly missed the point by enumerating several surface-level similarities read off the walls of the Tate Modern. 

The Tate Modern did not present Hilma after Klint’s Swan Series in full. Despite this oversight the exhibit was touching. I discuss some themes of thought below.


Spirituality and Theology

Mondrian felt all religions were ‘essentially the same but differed in form’. In Series II, af Klint abstracts major world religions as spheres, varying form and color. I wondered if both had absorbed Meister Eckhart’s quote “God is an infinite sphere whose center is everywhere, whose circumference is nowhere”. In af Klint’s case the circumference was visible to us, almost viewing as God. The consequence of this perspective is disarming in that you feel your inconsequentialness, rather than an inflated importance.

Series II, No 3c “The Mohammedan Standpoint” by Hilma af Klint
Muslims performing Tawaaf (circumambulation) around the Kaaba during Hajj or Umrah.
Becoming, Time and Temporal Distance

Mondrian’s abstractions are sometimes considered Platonic ideals, viewable in a ‘being’ state. I disagree – his paintings ‘become’ through the use of viewer and time as additional mediums. Mondrian left explicit instructions on viewing after the initial ‘one-shot’: taking eyes from plane to opposing plane to deepen an overall impression (Cooper, 1998). The work doesn’t exist as intended without you, and time spent looking.

This is most obvious (to me) in ‘Composition with Grid 3: Lozenge Composition’ (1918). In the Tate Modern, your first glimpse is the ‘whole thing’, maybe over people’s shoulders, partially obscured. When you’re stood in front of it, you run your eyes methodically in the ‘primary directions’: ↕ and ↔ to find an anchor point. 

The intersections of vertical and horizontal lead to the magical union, and balance. Then– suddenly it’s flickering! I saw circles, stars and electric lines, transforming from precise gray-black grid to something alive, dynamic and expansive. This is the process of input transformed by viewer and time to output (something exceeding the canvas). It’s I/O! (indeed somewhat Hegelian…).

Given Mondrian flat out refused to include diagonals when asked by Theo van Doesburg, their presence is curious especially because they are fundamental to the structure and flickering illusion. This is my favorite Mondrian because it’s subtly subversive to art history’s perception of a Mondrian. For example, in his pop history book on Modern Art, Will Gompertz says Mondrian is ‘always asymmetrical’. But he’s not here. That’s cool.

Composition with Grid 3: Lozenge Composition’ (1918) by Piet Mondrian
Closeup Composition with Grid 3: Lozenge Composition’ (1918) by Piet Mondrian

In af Klint’s work, the passing of time is harnessed in series: showing ascendant transformation or ‘evolution’ (e.g. The Swan, Ten Largest). Offensively, the Tate didn’t actually have the entire series on display, so you’re not seeing the ‘evolution’ to abstraction fully. However, No. 8 in the Swan series has a similar effect to Mondrian’s flickering grids: it’s visceral and alive. I almost fell over when I took my glasses off to look deeper. I wish I could capture how beautiful the transition from blurred vision to full quality was. There is similar dialectical intention here, as in Mondrian’s work.


The 8th painting in Swan Series by Hilma af Klint



Most curiously, af Klint used temporal distance to influence perception of her work in the public eye. This is the first time I’ve encountered art left for the future not incidentally, but intentionally. Mondrian’s work also benefitted from temporal distance; I’ve seen it on everything from socks to fashion runways. It’s generous to say this is because abstraction is universally understood, more accurate that his work is within our tolerance limits today (primary colors do not offend, straight lines do not provoke in the same way ovaries and eggs do). Capitalism loves a good, inoffensive minimalist – time passing makes you forget how radical his work was then, and how different from abstractions before it.Both used the concept of ‘becoming’. In Mondrian’s hideous ‘Evolution’ painting (Avatar X ‘Global Village Coffeehouse’) you see what he’s trying to go for, but the becoming is too obvious, too balanced. His skill is evident despite the ugliness: the painting glows from within, like stained glass.

Evolution (1911) by Piet Mondrian
Mondrian on Evolution: “It’s not so bad but I’m not there yet” . I’m sorry bro… it really was so bad 😅







Becoming is a major theme in af Klint’s series. In Swan Series, I felt she was When Two Become One’ing us. Both swans are swans, both had elements of feminine and masculine. I saw this as a collision of conflicting selves (an identity in question, resolved, leading to ‘ascension’?) or a fusion of two souls, but one devoid of dichotomy: the becoming was messy and in every ‘component’ vs above or below the line. The obvious ‘becoming’ takes place in both artists evolving from pictorial representations of Nature to abstractions. Mondrian takes the grid as a base, whereas af Klint is drawn to more organic shapes like spirals. I find it a little repulsive that ‘Evolution’ appeared in writing in both bodies of work; but this is because I like to be showed, not telled.

Nature, Precision and Scale

The Tate named a room ‘The Ether’ and rammed it full of af Klint’s notes, Jungian imagery, even Goethe’s color theory in an effort to contextualize the artists’ environment. Suffering from poorly displayed items and dim lighting, this room had little impact on me personally. In botanical paintings, you see af Klint’s precision and neat handwriting. For Mondrian, his botanical work is fluid and more delicate than his abstract work, it is his abstractions that grow tighter and more precise.

In contrast, af Klint’s abstract work is more fluid, messy, organic. She is abstracting something vaguer than nature in trying to capture ‘the soul’ in Ten Largest, religions in Series II. I know she got some flack for the flowers, eggs and snails, but I feel her work is more notional in being conceptually – not just visually, abstract. 

In the process of depicting concepts like union, age, eroticism, evolution and transcendense, I feel af Klint put more of herself into the paintings. I see her abstraction as more open to artistic license and ‘creation’, whereas I view Mondrian’s as ‘discovery’ – a distillation of Nature to its barest elements. For me, Mondrian’s path is less inventive, more concerned with finding the ingredients of balance. This is why I believe the Tate made a powerful decision bringing these artists together: they take radically distinct paths in exploring (sort of) similar metaphysical concepts.

Red Amaryllis with Blue Background (1907) by Piet Mondrian
Some Hilma af-Klintesque swirls in my watermelon
No. 2 Childhood, see top right for swirls maybe found in Nature 


Scale is another interesting dimension of comparison. As af Klint’s Ten Largest overwhelm and tower, intended as temple decoration, you lose yourself in the depths. They are like frescos and Rothko-esque in totality: attention is not so much demanded as ineviably given. You can very nearly feel the soft tempera paint without touching it. 

I find it curious that Mondrian experimented with placement (diamonds, not squares) but not extensively with scale; especially given he sought to explore totality, intentionally wanting to extend past the canvas. I wonder if making his later primary colored abstractions bigger may have made them less dynamic, harder to talk to. They are such a pleasing size, echoing precision and control.


Better Together or Apart?


Seeing these bodies of work together was important and I understood the value of curatorship upon reflection. I did have a very “She’s everything! He’s just Ken” moment when I switched focus from af Klint’s Eros to Mondrian’s yellow lozenge: but this was necessary in getting me to talk to the yellow lozenge. 

It was deeply upsetting that the whole of Swan Series was not present. There is something magical about seeing brushstrokes and canvas edges in real life. You can’t spot every detail in photographs. I loved the work overall. 

“Swan Series” in full from Hilma af Klint’s Facebook page


The great writer and poet Lana del Rey sings “Woah woah woah whatever. Everything. Whatever” reminding me of Mondrian’s 1915 comment “The rhythmical expansion in height and width, or radiation, or whatever this is, is the universal image of the beautiful movement of the universe”. Hilma Af Klint said ‘Those granted the gift of seeing more deeply can see beyond form, and concentrate on the wondrous aspect hiding behind every form, which is called life”. This prompts me to play Nature Boy on repeat, Nat King Cole’s version.

*






Come for a Kiss


Something about The Kiss pulls you in. I’ve been obsessed with visiting Vienna for a few years, having almost moved there in 2017. It’s a city similar to London in cultural capital and architecture (and public transport) albeit a little bit more polite, a little more rebellious.

On Twitter and a clip of Lady Gaga in House of Gucci came up: where her character mistakes Klimt’s portrait of Adele Bloch-Bauer for a Picasso. When the camera pans to the close up of Klimt’s painting, it was breathtaking: I knew it was time to head to Vienna and see some of his work in person. The Kiss is one of my favorite works of art, it demands interrogation despite being ubiquitous.


The Kiss, Der Kuss, Liebespaar (1908)


Arresting, Gilded Glamour

The Kiss lives in the Upper Belvedere in Vienna, amongst other Klimts. When I walked in, it was partially obscured by museumgoers heads and my first impression was the popular crop we often see. Half the bodies, no meadow. 

I’ll never forget my first full look. Towering powerfully, 1.8m x 1.8m (I’m 1.7m). It demands more attention than you can give in the moment. In the first 30 seconds I was overwhelmed. When I moved to take my camera out, the gold, silver and platinum began dancing, while the black on the guy’s robe pulled me in closer. It’s painful trying to articulate what this looked like, it’s something no 8K HD photo could convey.

Words floating through my head: vitality, alive, powerful, voyeuristic, tender, encapsulating, consuming, glamorous, dizzying, subversive. The memory of seeing it is so visceral I’m struggling to formulate a coherent sentence. It is compelling.

Contrast and Balance

There’s bright life in the meadow, the veins in his hands, the flushed cheeks, the man’s active stance and the woman kneeling. This vitality feels ephemeral, emphasized by how you can’t look forever. You know the moment is fleeting. Behind the lovers is unending nothingness flecked with stars of gold and platinum, adding permanence. 

The stances themselves are contradictory: the woman is very grounded in that she’s literally touching the Earth but she could not kneel eternally, making her stance fleeting.

There is strong contrast with color palettes and the realism the humans are painted in, vs abstraction and ‘decoration’ on the clothes and meadow. The humans’ necks, hair, faces vs their clothes, the meadow and the void could almost be from entirely different worlds: 3d vs flat. This speaks about how people in real love are one and the same, woven in a different fabric to the world around them. The lovers themselves are obviously different to each other. The clothes are different, as is the decoration perhaps symbolizing different body parts.

The contrast of life and void compresses the lovers into their own universe where everything but the other – and Beauty represented in robes, flowers and woman – has faded away. Gold contrasts with subject matter: metal is more lasting than paint, so while a kiss is fleeting, it’s there forever. Love as sublimation might be a theme: gold was only really used in religious European artwork pre-Klimt.






Movement and (e)Motion

When the viewer moved, so did The Kiss: the flowers seem to ‘blend’ together giving the illusion of wind through petals, metallic stars dance in the void, the robes glint and glimmer which makes you feel like the lovers are about to get up because their clothes are moving. 

Trailing threads from the man’s robe spread into the meadow. For me, this is about love spreading love: they are happy and beautiful, and trailing that right into the ground below. The man’s clothes appear more rigid decorated in mostly squares, hers are mostly swirls and circular shapes. But her swirls seem to have influenced his overcoat, and she has squares on her arms. This makes me feel like they’re becoming embedded in one another, that ‘embedding’ is driven home further by the inlaid stones in his overcoat.

Motion is in their stance: he’s bending (somewhat uncomfortably) and she’s kneeling. That’s not a super natural way for either of them to stand, so this isn’t a relaxed kiss, this is harnessed in the moment. Her stance is curious: reminding us of her agency, willingness and intention? The kiss is happening to her, but it appears to be a choice. She’s kneeling, but if she wasn’t, would she not tower over him?

The stances also comment on how love is less a give and take, more a give and give. She is giving him surrender, and he appears to be giving her protection by covering half of her visible form. She offers a cheek and he’s giving her the mouth and face. There are flowers behind her hand locked in between them: maybe she’s giving him flowers? She has flowers in her hair, and is decorated with Nature so maybe she is giving him growth? The squares on the masculine character’s clothes could look like doors, perhaps Love could be a door to opportunity for the feminine character.

Scale is important because the people are almost life-sized, occupying ~ 75% of 1.7m in height. Scale indicates importance, grandeur and the anonymity of subject generalises these Lovers to be Anyone In Love.

To Kiss or Be Kissed

My favorite part of this painting is the Kiss itself: it’s not on the mouth! It isn’t about the obvious, perhaps because this secondary cheek-kiss is more intimate given their relationship. The clothes appear erotically charged through their color vibrancy and decoration, flushed cheeks and willing passivity signal this could be about romantic love. It doesn’t look friendly.

Criticisms of The Kiss often cite female passivity. To query this: is it passive to accept service?

Serving or served?



Klimt’s intention in stance and kiss could be to convey that for lovers, acts not necessarily ‘public displays of affection’ can feel shocking and private to witness because of the energy they are charged with. It’s like being at a bar and knowing the two people sat opposite each other on their phones, ignoring each other, are married. 

This is a dynamic painting because of the effect of movement in the meadow, and because it captures a single moment in time that typically doesn’t last very long. Ephemerality indicated through stance and the unnatural brightness of the world occupied could pitch this as a journey of shared movement, a becoming ‘Liebespaar’ i.e. falling in love (made more powerful by you as viewer-voyeur falling into the dizzying decoration and void). 

It could equally symbolise a journey more lewd and differently explosive, but by drenching it in precious metals and painting it 6ft tall, Klimt makes this something Holy.


Two Liebespaar on their way to seeing The Kiss


*






Meaning and Reading


I read something. It was talking about somebody by describing how they talked about things. It was saying that someone was talking about things in a way that placed their ultimate meaning behind their words, so while their words still had a direct meaning, there was also something between, behind or inside the words that people would find if they were trying to reach for it. 

The thing I read was saying that this person’s words had, but also did not have, a meaning that made sense. It also said that this person’s words had impacted everybody with some dosage of the intended, ultimate meaning, even though not everybody would look for the hidden layers, nor know that they existed at all. 

When I was reading, my face was getting a little warmer because the thing I read situated the person we’re both talking about within a specific political context, while describing the way that the person we’re talking about writes in a specific way, as though influenced, following or labeled in the tradition of a certain author. 

The author that was allegedly being referenced by the person who was speaking esoterically was sometimes a contentious figure who often didn’t say what he meant but loaded the meaning elsewhere – but also allegedly, didn’t do this. The author of the thing I read said that the person who was talking with loaded meaning was what they called a “Lastname-ian” artist where the Last Name was of the contentious author who wrote about meaning in written texts as placed covertly to avoid censure. 

I didn’t think that the idea of the so-called contentious author was supplied as a hard and fast rule – which is to say that the referenced author didn’t mean that texts were always written in this way, but that some of the most popular texts referenced from the time of the Classics were sometimes written in ways that loaded further or actual intended meaning behind the words themselves, to avoid critique in its most intolerable and unsafe forms. I have never read anything the author referenced in the thing I read wrote. I Googled a summary of and skimmed the abstracts and end pages of three articles on JSTOR – but I didn’t want to log in because I felt lazy. 

The thing I was reading, the one I started this text talking about, was talking about the person’s esoteric words being placed in the context of right-wing prophesying. I got the feeling from the triumphant tone in the (two) authors words that they were happy about this interpretation. I think they thought it was the dominant and ultimately correct interpretation. I thought it was a surface level association that felt like an ink blot test, where you could see a butterfly or the current US President depending on the tilt of your head and what was inside it. I felt like my face was warm because I didn’t agree with the thing I was reading, I actually disagreed a lot. 

I didn’t know how to disagree because I hadn’t read anything by the author who was referenced, nor had I studied textual analysis. I didn’t really know so much about the political landscape of any country besides the temperature I could feel from existing inside it. This only stopped me because I was afraid of the repercussions of ignorance, but I could also do the thing the allegedly contentious author referenced in the thing I read was doing. I could question why the thing I read felt internally contradictory and in fact I needed to because I couldn’t understand why I said ‘internally contradictory”, I just knew that’s what it was to me. 

I think maybe I said it because I felt like the quote they chose was an example of the person speaking literally, and I didn’t feel like the meaning was so esoteric at all: the person was very obviously talking about the political temperament of a country triggering hyperindividualised, chronic rage, and a desire for wildness or to let all of those feelings out. 

I didn’t know if I felt that the quote wasn’t esoteric because it was easy for me to see that meaning where it might not be for someone else, or if I had a point about the quote being pretty direct to begin with. I don’t know why it’s important to think like this but it is. The steps the authors presented as a logical, foregone conclusion really were not so. I meant that I could see how they associated the political ideology with the referenced author, and I could see how they associated the artist they spoke about with the contentious author’s ideas on writing, but I didn’t see how any of this made it so the artist was aligned with their own political thought. 

The artist’s statement felt empirical and so perhaps politically agnostic. Her quote was talking about how everyone was framing their individual actions in reaction to an undercurrent of political tension. The artist whom the authors were talking about was not really speaking to the source of this tension, nor a resolution, but describing it.

Good artists are mirrors for the time we're in, so even though we make things from our own political perspectives, if we are good at what we make our makings reflect certain facets of our reality in ways as close to observation as possible. Mirrors absorb a lot of light, but reflect enough that you get a picture that you think is reality. 

The author doesn’t always die, but it is always possible to kill the author to get what you want from what you are reading. Whether you feel like you can is what shapes what you get from the text. And you feel like you can or can’t kill the author because of who you are, and what you are willing to think. 

This is why I think you need to see through a lot of perspectives to make conclusive statements on anything, but it is also why I think you need to keep making statements on things even if you don’t know what the statement is yet. The making of the statement is more interesting than the statement sometimes. 

I didn’t totally understand why I was put off by the association of the artist and the authors preferred political ideology. I think its just because I felt like it wasn’t true and because the ideology felt bad, but that didn’t make it an interpretation that wasn’t true to the authors who wrote it. I think I was annoyed at the association of that artist with the ideology. I understood why I didn’t want to read the referenced author’s text (you know, the one that in the thing I’m reading made the person a LastName-ian artist), where he talked about persecution and how that affected the writing of certain texts. It was dangerous but also probably exactly as it should be to get my information about that referenced author from authors who wrote about him, but I didn’t want it to be so dangerous that I was lost, so I looked for a few different kinds of people talking about his text about texts. 

I think this is not a pipe but it really looks like one so it takes a lot of energy, sometimes as much as it took to write this, to think of it as a painting of a pipe made in one specific way, by one kind of person, with all of the things that made that person who they were at that point in time. 

That’s why you have to talk about things with yourself so much that you can talk about them as not being the things they are, but as what they meant to you on that one day you saw them and talked about them.


References



  1. The thing I read
  2. The artist’s own words in context
  3. The referenced contentious-ish author’s text about writing
  4. Michel Foucault – Ceci N’est Pas Un Pipe
  5. Roland Barthes – The Death of The Author
  6. Claire Dederer – Monsters
  7. Everything’s just too semiotic – and you know me right? I don’t know where I am half the time”  a quote from Sputnik Sweetheart – Haruki Murakami.






What is an Artist?


The center limits free play


At the start of wanting to make anything, I feel myself in my mind diving into light liquid. It normally feels like a snap, a bounce, a fast motion with ripples. There’s no pattern in how the desire to be creative starts, but I know how it goes once it starts. 

It’s like: something falls, clicks, moves and there is a need to make the first thing, Sometimes there’s a plan first or sometimes I just make the thing in full. It then waits untouched for a while, very often when it is revisited there’s a realisation that the first thing wasn’t the thing trying to express itself, The thing to express is something around it and enveloping it, but not it.

Yesterday a Youtube video on twee prompted fervid embarrassment as I deliberated whether my 2010’s wardrobe and indeed elements of my personality could be read as twee. The Manic Pixie Dream Girl is overanalyzed, stale, obsolescent, but I’m reminded of the trope a lot. Not really from people who engage in ‘cultural criticism’ but from well-meaning individuals who want to draw a physical comparison to characters they valence as charming, often in split-second subconscious decisions. People who’d like to remark on my interests perhaps to exalt, trivialize or just make conversation will sort of assign me a flavor of the MPDG chip brand. 


F NO I DIDN’T MEAN TO I JUST GOT BANGS CUZ MY FOREHEAD WAS SO SMALL  I HATE HER A LITTLE TBH


ME AND MY BEST FRIEND WE HUNG OUT EVERY DAY SHE WAS THE SELENA GOMEZ TO MY DEMI LOVATO THE PARIS HILTON TO MY NICOLE RICHIE SHE’S STILL SO COOL


In following the murmurs of cultural analysis prompted by that video, and by a desire to figure out the reality of my style and relationship with beauty in the 00s to 10s, I ended up with 1,980 words on a Pages doc. This was writing about personal tension with twee, the feels-good-bad-resentment of achieving likeability or positive external perception at the cost of that perception being relatively hollow or incorrect, how I grew up in relative cultural peripherality but always had an ear against the wall of the room where ‘the culture’ was taking place.

A PHOTO IN MY HOME STUDIO CONTAINING: (1) SELFIE IN A MIRROR GIFTED TO MY SISTER REGIFTED TO ME (2) A FAN FROM MUSEO DEL PRADO FROM MY HUSBAND BEFORE HE WAS (3) A MILLENIAL LIPSTICK SHADE VESPER (4) TROPHY LOVINGLY GIVEN TO ME BY MY FRIENDS FOR MY COMMITTMENT TO FAILING AND LAUGHING (5) RATBURGER CASE GIFTED TO ME BY A DEAR FRIEND SORELY MISSED NOW DEAD 3 YEARS (6) CHERRY PASTILLES FROM EATALY WITH THE GIRLS 


There wasn’t just writing, there was also a spectrum of ingenuous-innocence-artifice to astute-worldliness-substance where I placed characters like Taylor Swift, Alexa Chung, Margot Tenenbaum, Summer Finn, Zooey Deschanel, Ramona Flowers and Clementine Kruczynski on it. 

Old photos of myself from 2003 to 2018 were analyzed, I picked apart my clothing, hair, what people told me about my appearance, and fashioned my personality as a mega-club within which entry to various themed rooms was possible. 

My ‘fashion choices’ reflected which room had the loudest music coming out of it on the day. There were several paragraphs where I tugged at the seams of gender and presentation and found not much more than it depends, it varies, I don’t have consistent answers, I’m a girl woman woman girl. It was an attempt to situate myself inside / outside sub-or-culture(s) knowing I was never in them.



IN MY BRIGHT TEENAGE BEDROOM BEING NOT LIKE OTHER GIRLS  BEING EXACTLY LIKE OTHER GIRLS I PAINTED A MURAL ON THE WALL SAYING ‘life is as good as you make it’


This meretricious scrutiny of my experience didn’t make me feel like I had dived to the bottom of the pool. I meant everything I wrote but it was not what I wanted to explore. What was the point of analysing my past relationship with beauty, clothing or pop culture? What was the writing supposed to be about? What is an artist in a world where everyone can make everything but not everyone can make that thing? Is it about being a mirror to your times? Is it about expressing yourself? Is it venial or lazy to ask questions and not answer them? 


For three months now I’ve been trying to get my hair cut. Julia Fox talked about dreaming of “living off grid and like pumping water from my own well having the solar panel I know, it’s like that’s like how deep I want to go, like that’s what off grid is though, it’s like you have a well in your property and you have solar panels and it’s all solar energy maybe there’s like a like middle ground or Upstate New York, I don’t know…”. 

My home is between two lakes, two forests, several fields, moss, so green, foxes, big city roads, stabbings, city buildings, nobody comes here, but all people are here. When I want to be in the city I am, but I am never in the city if I don’t want to be. Most days I’m making things in my home studio. Trying to get my hair cut or my nails done is like trying to push wrong poles of those two giant oval magnets together: it repels. I don’t think about other people getting their hair cut or nails done, my husband has clockwork haircuts on the cycle recommended by the barberess. 

ONE TIME I HAD MY HAIR CUT IN THE CLUB THE UNDERCUT GREW OUT WEIRD AND BRIEFLY I HATED IT


Last week in Paris I walked by a nail salon I’d read so much about with an image of mignonne piano nails done a while ago I wanted to repeat but I can’t do it! It’s not about trying to find a different kind of beauty, nor about growing my hair. 

It’s not about resistance or existence or complying with or subverting beauty standards; as much as those are omnipresent gates around the woman-building in my mind. It’s the absence of meaning, my appearance is off-grid, but it’s not really because it doesn’t know about a/the grid. I’m not trying to obfuscate, but it’s dawning on me that sometimes the absence of understanding is what you’re supposed to get. The twee video embarrassed me when tension in beauty was made visible because that tension wouldn’t have existed if my focus was was the space between and around dressing a certain way, or not doing my eyebrows or my hair.

It’s about the hypocrisy of writing to better understand my life and fashion choices and rightfully claiming cultural peripherality but placing culture at the top, in the center, then building out theories of why and how I parsed status markers or coolness in the 00s. That’s not really why those choices were made. To pretend there was consistent meaning behind wearing polka dots, tea dresses, having long hair and bangs would be dishonest. To center the culture is to pretend there was no play. To center the culture or my environment, or whatever I was reading or watching is perhaps the only way I could’ve learned what I liked wearing or why I liked it. To understand myself from that place helped me understand past subversion, approval, exclusion. Simultaneously the process of clarification from the center obscured some truth in my relationship with external expression. 

In selling my art (coming soon, I urge you to start saving) some kind of beauty either un/conventional undeniably furthers commercial success. Virality is almost guaranteed through looksmaxxing. I’m not saying I won’t, I’m not saying I will. 

There are barely any areas in my life requiring suppression, editing or refinement of the self. My lifetime commitments are made in that the people I want to be around for the rest of my life are already there. There’s no workplace I need to bring a partial self to. I feel drawn to propelling and enabling fundamental change in the lives of a handful, Beyond the initial, sizeable dopamine hit of being well-liked, there is not much value in mass appeal.

I came to play. For now my physical avatar has to explore the absence of meaning as much as presence.


Questions for the culture:

01. What do you care about more, the question or the answer? 

02. What does it feel like when you get the answer? 

03. What does it feel like when you don’t?

04. What is beautiful to you in other bodies? Why?

05. What is a girl? Why and when is a girl a woman also?

06. Which parts of this webpage annoy you? What do you like?

07. Charli xcx isn’t on the cover of her latest album. In the Brat album cycle how does she engage with the “constant demand for access to women’s bodies and faces”? Is reaction to the album cover sexist or symptomatic of mass oversimplication? Does it matter? Who cares? What else could she do? Why am I not writing about it?






Tod und Leben


I am thinking about Death and Life, 1908–15! This painting measures 200 cm across and is 180 cm long, making its width the length of a double bed, its height exceeds mine by 18 cm. Klimt considers it his ‘most important figurative work’ (Leopold Museum Wien). 

Gustav Klimt: Death and Life, 2nd version c.1915


In Contrast

There are Temu ads on gustav-klimt.com.

Opening view of Gustav-klimt.com



Should you wish to purchase the domain KLIMT.com this is bundled into a retail offer with two wearable keychains that can be used for contactless payments by a retailer/artist credited as “LAKS”. Lady Gaga recently said “art and capitalism can be friends, it just depends how it happens” before filming a short promotional film for the Louvre tied into the world of Joker, and her album Harlequin. MGM’s motto remains “Ars Gratia Artis” (art for art’s sake). In thinking of art poetically, the soul and the money sit in similar tension to the idea of gentle Klimt and his cats, adoringly painting in a robe and father-of-14-womaniser Klimt, painting expensive portraits for the Viennese Jewish nobility of the Belle Epoque. In thinking practically, the Kiss’s first sale brought Klimt 20x the annual salary of a teacher and in June 2024 another Klimt sold for a record-breaking £85.3 million.

Contrast is the spectrum of difference. Opposition in personality, variety in the day-to-day makes life interesting. How a painter uses contrast makes art exciting. Klimt is contradictory in life and this painting is full of visual and thematic contrast.

In 1907 before painting ‘Death and Life’, he was commissioned to decorate the Great Hall of the University of Vienna, but his subversive takes on medicine, jurisprudence and philosophy were determined too obscene for academic wall decor. These paintings were still appreciated: the panel ‘Philosophy’ won gold at the Paris World Exhibition. In the sole surviving photo of the would-be ceiling panel ‘Medicine’ signature nudes float in the smoke of life, with skulls, suggesting an ambiguity to the life state through proximity to death. Medicine carries connotations of mortality, Klimt’s thoughts while painting ‘Medicine’ were probably similar as with ‘Death and Life’. When the University attempted to remove the paintings insisting they were state property, Klimt hunted down staff with a shotgun to recover his work.

Death and Life’ won prizes at exhibitions including at 1911’s International Art Expo Rome, for the prior version with gilded background. People like buying shiny things, and gilding was becoming a signature Klimt move. Despite this Klimt painted over the background in macabre greens and blacks, while the painting was still in frame. He makes major changes to Death: adds a club, more cheekiness, complexity, less holiness with no halo, more holiness in crosses, a dark void-like background in blacks and greens.


Gustav Klimt, Death and Life c.1908 (prize-winner )



Stuff Everyone Cares About and Has Seen Before

Klimt takes themes so universal as to be banal: love, death, life. Rainer Maria Rilke’s famous ‘Letters to a Young Poet’ advises the titular young poet to avoid ‘ordinary’ themes because “it takes a great, fully ripened power to create something individual where good, even glorious traditions exist in abundance”.

Familiar themes work sometimes like variable elimination. Painting about mortality is like submitting a painting instead of submitting an autographed urinal to an art exhibition. It’s like painting a still life instead of an abstract ‘contents of my airport security tray Summer 2009’. Instead of investigating why Klimt painted about Death and Life, the focus is on why this way.

Klimt also uses ancient symbols that transcend language, like circles, skulls, and flowers. Circles and flowers are some of the first things children draw. Things so familiar feel fresh because of the style choices made: where the circles are, how the skull violates expectation, the colors, the lines.


Order

Death leads in title and visual appearance (if trained to read left to right, Life would appear to the left). This break from convention abstracts the concept of mortality from self to humanity: thinking individually, you live before you die, but death and life is orderless and incessant for humanity, happening cyclically.

Color

Death’s three key hues are blue, purple, and green. Life’s are a lot warmer: coral, mustard, yellows, peaches, pinks, colder greens, red, brighter blues than in Death’s robes. Sombre against celebratory. Life contrasts against the background much more strongly than Death. 

Death’s purple-ish robe is royal. There is unresolved movement between sad and vibrant in Death’s color palette with muted blues against green, vibrant purple-blue. It’s like the clothes are supposed to be sad, but are not quite as sombre as they should be.

Covering and Ornament

The crosses on Death’s robe mark Christianity and morality, evoking gravestones and reminders of death. Crosses can also be seen to mark respect for Death, despite its negative associations of sorrow, grief, ending; because it is unlikely crosses are associated with taboo or evil. The specific co-sign of crosses defangs the Death skeleton without sacrificing complexity and gravity.

Death’s robe has on it whole circles, circles bisected in two, a circle bisected horizontally with the lower half then bisected vertically. Life’s robes have circles with no linear divisions; there are some circles that have a curve kind of like that in the Pepsi logo. Death’s crosses contrast with the circles on Death’s robe, angular opposite curve. Death robe feels narrower than a wiggle skirt: the compression suggesting ‘stuck’ which implies inevitable.

Life is wearing shapeless covers of patterned and ornamented fabric – no less, but differently embellished than Death’s robes. Life’s symbols are of nature (flowers) drawn simply, childlike alongside triangles. Triangles suggesting perfection and power (Holy Trinity, parent state, Mind Body Spirit, Past Present Future). The mathematical symbol for change is also a triangle, life is constant change.

Death’s expression contradicts expectation: the 1908 version shows Death’s side profile with head bowed but this changed to quizzical, humorous, playful, sinister by 1915. The head tilt and grin are almost playful like I’m about to hear a joke, which is surprising. 

In ‘Life’ there are closed eyes, the tallest character wears an almost sybarite smirk, two figures have their head bowed like they’re wrapped up in each other. Life’s character set is not really looking at anything, self-absorbed, not looking at Death. Life is engaging with Life, which is the point of Life.

Position, Staging and Weight

Klimt’s Memento Mori juxtaposes skeletal Death against a mass of nine human figures of all ages: one blissful, one smugly joyous, one with mouth half open, one half-visible with eyes closed, two heads bowed, one baby and one elderly woman, one blind figure with eyes wide open.

Life’s side of the painting has a sense of pantomime. This ‘artifice’ might come from the poses being unnatural, the expressions exaggerated and the combination of people unlikely. It is also kind of ‘unreal’ how life must be lived without thinking about death so much as to be paralysed by fear, but aware of mortality enough to maximise for contentment. Klimt posed Death somewhat realistically. In contrast, Life’s character set is physically placed in ways we would never see people. Death carries connotations of honesty, because bone is natural, when clothes are stripped there is a body, when the body is stripped there is skeleton: the ultimate equaliser.

Death takes up about half the visual weight of the ‘Life’ form. The distance between Death and Life’s figures is about the size of Death. Death’s form is cleaner: the curves are longer, it is obvious what the figure is, Death is contained inside the canvas space. Life’s forms contrast with wavier edges, a huddled mass of many people of unknown origin and terminus, existing in a meadow ending ‘off screen’. Life is much messier, with implied motion because of the waviness of everyone’s robes, and through causing eyes to dance around the section as we scan the faces. The background is curved and graded lighter behind Life, appearing as though Life emerges from a tunnel of (dim, so, faraway) Light. Death isn’t in a ‘resting’ position but the figure looks still, expectant.

Visual asymmetry and the awkward distance between the two sets of figures suggest imbalance and disconnect. Life is not a choice but the living have agency in terminating it. Death is a destination that cannot be left, but can be entered by choice. Life is the absence of Death. Death is Life absenting. 


Swatched main colors, boxes highlight space taken up by each side


Second Look

While the subject matter and Klimt’s painting style are obvious cues we should ‘look deeper’, in looking deeper, there is a sense of things not being as they are (or, should). In personifying abstract concepts Klimt has made us empathise, leading us to see Death as ‘a being like us’: finite. The curiously blissful expressions in ‘Life’ initially suggest serenity, fulfillment, togetherness but to smile so sweetly next to Death feels foolish. Death’s head tilted creates curiosity, coupled with the skeletal grin this doesn’t produce a menacing skeleton. A grin with so many teeth suggest flight attendant instead of belly laughter, it’s not quite honest. To ‘show your teeth’ is to communicate you can defend yourself – can Life? In querying this expression (and we naturally are drawn to faces), the association is initially with humor and we forget that we see a grinning skull only once Death has visited. 

The grin and teeth make the skull as a symbol essential to dialogues of mortality, honesty and surprise in this painting. The skeleton, being covered by clothes like a body, is less ‘raw’ – more anatomically accurate Grim Reaper.

Death is armed with a club, the only entity in possession of an object other than clothing. This also makes Death the only figure with obvious intent, suggesting agency and power. The weapon suggests inevitability, Death’s entitlement. A club specifically might say bluntness, directness, surprise: the moment of Death always unforeseen.

Looking again: an armed, powerful, relentless Death dressed in more masculine colors opposing static, unaware, helpless Life in colors ‘hyper–natural’, feminine and warm. Life’s figures feel more fragile now, ephemeral, perhaps posed unnaturally precisely because the pose will never hold. 

Between Versions


Klimt’s revisions are the most compelling technical aspect of the painting: they feel correct. The later background competes less with the figures, and it also feels a lot less holy. It feels much more brutalist, reminding me of the Chromatica Ball stage where Lady Gaga uses minimal setting to allow a ‘real hard look’ at the performance. The newer background does not impede eye movement between both sides of the painting as much, forcing a hard look at the relationship between Death and Life. It also reminds me of the black curtains at the backs of stages.

In between versions Klimt raises Death’s head, expands the visual weight of Life, makes Death more fluid with curving robes, and arms Death. At risk of sounding overly simplistic, these are all cues to pay deeper attention: to see more sides of the same thing so you feel more fully about it. These moves also empower and endear Death; the previous version’s bowed head version is too formal, too spectre-like to feel personified. 

I’m not like other girls, I’m sad


Death appears alone, Life in ensemble. Death is a door to homogeneity: When you are dead, you are dead like any other dead person. When you are alive, no two lives are the same. Not like the opening of Anna Karenina: “All happy families are alike, each unhappy family is unhappy in it’s own way”, where Tolstoy homogenises happiness.

Elsewhere, referring to the group therapy setting, Princess Babygirl writes in ‘Millenial Maxxing’ that “All the people who hurt us are complicated in the same way, sacrificing in both directions as the lamb and the butcher”. It looks like hurting (as an action, not a reaction) is made up of the same-ish landscape. To live unhappy long term can make you feel ‘dead inside’. Happy families can be understood as those with contentment, the source of which is acceptance. Personally, nine Lana del Rey albums and several years spent on tumblr make the sameness of sadness feel like a welcome sentiment. 

Playing with these quotes alongside the painting is interesting, because Klimt renders Living as terribly complex, full of purpose yet pointless, and death a leveller. Homologation is the relationship between two opposing entities – let’s examine these homologies:

• Life : Death
• Alive: Dead
• Content : Discontent [Happy : Unhappy]
• Heterogenous : Homogenous




Klimt’s ‘Life’ characters are not painted so bright as to shout from the canvas, they swell from a tunnel of light, they are many, they are different in age, gender, body, position, expression – they are alive, some of them are smiling, none look particularly sorrowful. But Death is not particularly sorrowful, not really menacing. This creates ambiguity in seating Death at both the tables of Content and Discontent, because the feeling that doesn’t neatly fit there is acceptance – that’s what the painting says as a whole, even as the sides Life and Death speak for themselves. Death appears to fade, but not quite, but is not a spectre of doom. This visual effect feels like an acceptance of the human condition.

Words are the wrong medium for trying to explain what this painting says. They can just guide you to the kinds of stuff you might want to think about.




Two Monsters


Parallels in ‘The Fame Monster’ and ‘Inventions of the Monsters’

I was focusing on Dali today in my research for my book on Semiotics of Skulls, leading me to Dali’s painting “Invention of the Monsters”. While doing this I was listening to The Fame Monster, as I often am while working. Regrettably, I have an hour before leaving my home, so I intend to further expand this article at a later date. It’s painful to write incompletely, but that is the in-progress ethos of Unified Memory.

There are undeniable parallels between the two works!

 



Inventions of the Monsters (1937) by Salvador Dali



Dark Art in Dark Times

Inventions of the Monsters was painted in 1937, a year before Hitler’s annexation of Austria in March 1938, a year after the start of the Spanish Civil War. This was a painting made in turbulent times. Dali was introduced to the Surrealists by Joan Miró in 1929. The same Surrealist Andre Breton who termed Dali “synonymous with revelation in the most resplendent sense of the word” later kicked him out in 1934 for what he deemed the ‘glorification of Hitler-ian fascism’. For what it’s worth, I personally don’t think Dali was enamored with Hitler, but I’m fairly sure he wasn’t explicitly anti-fascist. Which is no defense of whatever abhorrent things he undoubtedly did. 

The Fame Monster dropped in 2009 bringing eight new tracks to “The Fame” universe, with Gaga describing the two albums as ‘yin and yang’. In 2009, the world was reeling from global recession and artists beginning to note hypercommercialism as an emerging problem. Digital connection was not yet the behemoth of ever-connectedness we have today, but was not far off as Facebook dominated the social media landscape. It’s now romanticised as a more innocent time, but we were already experiencing some of the evils of digital omnipresence; the strain you experience from growing up on an un-erasable Internet where everything you say simultaneously matters a lot, but not at all. In 2009, it was becoming apparent that certain factions of society had too much power, as banks were bailed out by governments with what felt like impunity to people who had lost their homes, or like my husband, graduated in a landscape where businesses were firing, not hiring. It’s not surprising the tone of albums released in 2009 were darker, but also focused on the affordable joys of partying, friendship, relationships, somewhat amplifying DIY fashion. I saw a lot of tutorials on customizing denim cutoffs and jackets that year. 

The obvious parallel is social unrest as the backdrop: economic recession for Gaga’s album, war across Europe for Dali’s painting. Instability, unclear futures reflected in the darker tones of both works.

Gaga explicitly referencing Dali via fashion in ARTPOP era performances



Monsters


In The Fame Monster each track spotlights a specific monster, a personification of aspects of fame, and also aspects of life. In talking about the ‘re-release’ The Fame Monster Gaga says:

On my re-release The Fame Monster, I wrote about everything I didn't write on The Fame. While traveling the world for two years, I've encountered several monsters, each represented by a different song on the new record: my 'Fear of Sex Monster,' my 'Fear of Alcohol Monster,' my 'Fear of Love Monster,' my 'Fear of Death Monster,' my 'Fear of Loneliness Monster,' etc." "I spent a lot of nights in Eastern Europe, and this album is a pop experimentation with industrial/Goth beats, 90's dance melodies, an obsession with the lyrical genius of 80's melancholic pop, and the runway. I wrote while watching muted fashion shows and I am compelled to say my music was scored for them.

I took considerable artistic license and assigned monsters to some tracks below, putting a question mark where I wasn’t so sure.

Bad Romance: Fear of Love Monster
Alejandro: Fear of Men Monster?
Monster: The Sex Monster?
Speechless: Fear of Death Monster
Dance in the Dark: Self Monster
Lovegame: Lust, Control Monster
Paper Gangsta: Deception and Betrayal Monster
Beautiful, Dirty, Rich: Greed and Vanity Monster
Telephone: Suffocation Monster
So Happy I Could Die: Fear of Alcohol Monster. Fear of Loneliness Monster?
Teeth: Truth Monster


Dali put numerous monsters in his painting, terming them so. In his congratulatory telegram to the Art Institute of Chicago upon the purchase of the painting, he mentioned these explicitly:

Horse women: ‘maternal river monsters’
Flaming giraffe: ‘masculine apocalyptic monster’
Cat angel: ‘equals divine heterosexual monster’
Hourglass: ‘metaphysical monster’
Gala and Dali: ‘equal sentimental monster’
Little blue dog*: ‘not a true monster’


*the little blue dog is hard to find, he’s in the bottom right.

I noted additional monsters, including the Female Figure with Sort of Dissolving Head, which I read to imply being muddled, manipulated, confused – parallel to Gaga’s Paper Gangsta and Teeth. In Dali’s time I can imagine this referencing the manipulation of the public into war, the division of society. I note the egg, which I see as a glimmer of hope against the ‘maternal river monster’ noting ‘maternal’ can encompass exceptional cruelty (birth inherently so, mother-wound more painful than Daddy Issues) but also exceptional hope (birth is new life, a forced future-facing outlook: children are synonymous with future).

Universal Fears
Both works focus on timeless fears: death, for one. Dali’s hourglass, butterfly, indeed the general mood being ominous because of the war. Gaga in Speechless writes about her father refusing a heart procedure, which no doubt made her reflect on the fragility of her parents, the ephemerality of existence itself. Both works seem to reflect on violation, with Gaga talking about this explicitly in Monster, which we can parse more accurately as a reflection on assault with what we know about her life today. 

Dali violates the giraffe, setting in ablaze, his horse-headed woman a violation of nature. Both works don’t necessarily make immediate sense, giving me a huge hit of nostalgia for the days of symbolism-laden art, when things did not need to be stated as immediately and explicity. This is partial romanticism on my part, partial awareness that unless things are spelled out, we don’t seem to be able to read meaning into things anymore, indeed we obfuscate the ability for viewers to do so in our own work. The lyricism in Brat, for example stands in direct contrast to the metaphor-laden Teeth (in later Gaga work, Judas).
I’m inclined to feel artists become more introspective during times of instability, likely because the Self is the most Controllable thing – our desire for control increases alongside background anxiety. Therefore I am unsurprised Dali centered himself and wife Gala in his painting, and that Gaga’s album explores fears and facets of the Self in The Fame Monster. I see glimmers of this now in the culture ‘waking’ to endemic lack of agency alongside the serious threat of rising levels of authoritarianism, perhaps by working on physical fitness or imbibing Ozempic, expanding their skill sets in times of prolonged post-pandemic lack of prosperity.

A curious difference is the optimism which shines through Gaga’s album, yet despite icons and symbols of hope, is lacking in Dali’s painting. It is impossible this opinion is not tinted with the lens of nostalgia, because I grew up with Gaga’s album and am far more familiar with it. I do think there is some objective truth in the feeling of Gaga’s album being positive, even if purely that it is dance music, which was experienced in togetherness – whereas Dali’s art creates some distance purely through egocentricism of theme (you can’t unsee his face, you can sing Gaga’s lyrics). 

Dali also titles the painting such that monsters are doing the invention, whereas Gaga’s monsters are self-invented in tandem with socially constructed identity, self-experienced. It’s not the monsters that have the power, in her work so much – in Dali’s, they are empowered.

Masks abound in Dali’s painting, which of course echoes the many masks Gaga wears. I cannot yet talk more about this.

Money Made With Love is Art?

Dali said he had a “A pure, vertical, mystical gothic love of cash”. Which may explain why he designed the Chupa Chups logo, of all things. It’s undeniable he did a good job, placing the logo on the top of the sucker instead of the left, so you would always see it no matter how the lollipop was placed. Gaga during her ARTPOP days wanted to reverse Warhol who wanted to make art of the soup can, by ‘putting the art on the soup can’. I’m not sure that Dali beat her to it because he was not quite as literal as putting a Bosch print on a McQueen dress, or a Koons on the album cover…but I wouldn’t say he didn’t. 

One of my all time favorite pieces of graffiti found in London, 2022


Gaga remains a hypercommercial, if not the most commercial, artist of our times: featuring in blockbuster movies, Vegas residencies, two Haus Labs marketing emails weekly, tour tickets retailing with multiple zeros at the end of the price tag. It is intriguing that her merch may sell out, but she doesn’t: the integrity coming maybe from the feeling that everything is genuinely felt, even if it’s expensive. 

Finally, I would like to introduce the interesting coincidence that Joan Miró who introduced Dali to the Surrealists, painted ‘Carnaval de Arlequin’ in 1924. Gaga released her album Harlequin a full 100 years later, in 2024, in a melding of her own cinematic universe and that of Todd Philips’ Joker

Carnaval d’Arlequin (1924) by Joan Miró


Another interesting link is Dali’s Mae West lips sofa turning up in ‘House of Gucci’ in a scene where Maurizio, played by Adam Driver, is in the middle of flirting with Paola Franchi. He tells her initially not to be scared of touching anything, but later says “actually, be a little scared, that couch costs more than most people’s apartments in Monte Carlo”. 

Dali’s Mae West Lips couch in Maurizio’s infidelity-core apartment






Surreal Skulls in Delvaux and Dali


Here are two Surrealist skulls:

  • Salvador Dali, Skull of Zurbarán (1956) 
  • Paul Delvaux, Skeletons in an Office (1944) 

There follows a little information about them alongside what I consider the aspartame of analysis, since the goal is just a very brief glance, not a deep, lingering, full-fat look.

Squelettes dans un Bureau

Paul Delvaux was a Belgian painter considered a Surrealist despite only briefly working with the Surrealists. Surrealist techniques disposing with ‘reality’ appear to have erased constraints for him, with the artist noting that ‘painting lit lamps’ alongside ‘Roman arches’ unlocked ‘great inventiveness’. 

He used skeletons as a leitmotif but publicly available research or commentary on his work focuses on the female nudes. This makes it difficult not to scoff at societal attitudes to skeletons and skulls, but the lack of cranial content encountered likely reflects my weaknesses as a researcher. 

Squelettes dans un Bureau (1944) by Paul Delvaux


This painting is titled ‘Squelettes dans un Bureau’ translating to ‘Skeletons in an Office’. In some sources it’s called ‘Skeletons in an Office (Waiting for the Librarian)’. It measures 99 x 123.5 cm and features a library with six skeletons in it. Delvaux’s title is funny, echoing my experience in trying to write this because I too was waiting for the librarian (Facebook group admin to give me institutional PDF access). 

The skeletons are used as stand-ins for humans, which he did frequently. Initially, this creates humor from the expectation gap: boney entity doing human thing. Beyond being funny, the use of the skeleton has an anonymising and slightly objectifying effect. In the setting of an office, this is effective. A 21st century reading can’t help but affiliate ‘drones’, interchangeability, thing-ifying humans with a work setting. 

We don’t read the skeletons as mindless machines with negative connotations perhaps because the setting is cheerful; there’s a big sunny window and we appear to be safe high up in a building. The skeleton placed near the window looking outwards implies there is something to look up, or forward to, which is optimistic. Positive associations of productivity arise from being in a library, and through the collaboration implied by the six skeletons’ awareness of each other’s presence. I wonder if the literary mood of this painting prompted several novelists to reference or respond to Delvaux in their work.

The skeletons poses are carefree, very natural so while they may appear inquisitive or engaged, they don’t seem stressed (likely the skeletal ‘grin’ effect makes us feel like they’re smiling, subconsciously). 

He didn’t paint this as crisply or eerily as some of his other skeletons, in fact it reads as a storybook style and I would not be surprised to find this on the cover of a young adult book. This seems intentional, given skeletons were a nostalgic motif for him, a symbol that he found beauty in after being afraid of them as a child. The Surrealists were also fascinated with Alice in Wonderland, which is a children’s book, perhaps that was in the back of Delvaux’s mind when painting this.

I see this as an uplifting painting but note that Belgium (like much of Europe) was war-torn while Delvaux was experiencing this fascination with skeletons (war : bodies, death). It’s probably not a coincidence that I’m obsessed with skulls post-pandemic, perhaps reinforcing that all light needs dark for balance.

Skull of Zurbarán

We all know Dali, and today I’m finding him especially grating, so let’s keep biography minimal. This is a painting from 1956, in his ‘classical period’ where he explored (according to the Dali fangay organisation museum) ‘meticulously detailed images of religious, historical and scientific themes’: what he called ‘nuclear mysticism’. He remarried wife Gala in a Catholic Church in 1958. I conjecture he influenced Kanye West to infuse his relationship with Bianca Censori with the same caudalism as his own marriage.

Skull of Zurbarán (1956) by Salvador Dali
The skull referenced here belongs to Fransisco de Zurbarán. He was a Spanish painter known for dramatic chiaroscuro (very strong light-dark contrast), monks and still-lifes. 

He painted in a Baroque style, which – apologies – I find tremendously boring. The most interesting thing Zurbarán did is infuse his monks with little context, little narrative and use mostly bluey, cool tones instead of the warmth of something like “An Experiment on a Bird in the Air Pump” by Joseph Wright. Without the title, you would not know this is the skull of Zurbarán.

Initial associations:

  • Archway: knowledge, journey
  • Monks: religion, thobes
  • Tesselated Cubes: Zellij, mosque, math, Ibn Battuta, precision, technology
  • Bulbuous temple: Temple (lol), wisdom, unknowable, moon and craters
  • Skull: MF Doom, Marvel comic villains, Phantom of the Opera, Ballerina en tête de mort, death, warning
  • Color of ‘skull’: gilded, riches, earthly, promise
  • Height of space relative to monks: cavernous, echoey, important


The skull doesn’t easily read as a human skull, which is why I selected this painting in contrast to the explicit skeletal presence in Delvaux’s painting. This skull reads masklike. However, it’s irrefragably a skull because of Dali’s title.

We tend to reflect on mortality as we get older, which is why renewed religious focus or conversion (reversion if to Islam) is common amongst middle-aged people. When your vessel (body) begins to creak with age, it seems obvious to think about your afterlife, and indeed morality. Since he’s just like other girls, Dali experienced a ‘reversion’ to his Catholic roots in middle age – the roots which were initially blamed for (gasp) guilt about sexuality (interestingly manifesting in him being a virgin when he first met Gala). 

He valued the ‘perfect architecture’ of the faith, this admiration led him to paint a well-received rendering of the Immaculate Conception for Pope Pius XII in 1949. This ‘perfection’ may be reflected in the mathematical precision of the tesselated squares, and in the painting itself being a perfect square, 1.03 x 1.03 meters.

This is the context in which monks approach the archway. Which leads me to a relatively generic interpretation of religious journey, reverence. The destination aimed for being Zurbarán’s skull echoes Dali’s reverence for master artists in Spain, I personally hear the message that to emulate or exceed the greats, you must first approach them. The destination being positive or great is reinforced because the temple of the skull resembles a cratered moon. The two cubes in the bottom left of the skull have small archways, doors perhaps to options. One arch is cracked with what resembles water damage, one painted very out-of-focus. The cracked arch symbolises a negative path. Since it’s in a skull which houses a mind, perhaps speaking to some negative facet of self in both Zurbarán and Dali. The unfocused archway perhaps is about the unknowable, what’s inside you that you have yet to discover, and maybe if you did see it you wouldn’t know what it was. 

More interesting details here are the colors in the lighting on the tesselated cube flooring, very delicately rendered purples and greens, giving a …well, surreal and otherwordly feeling. The precision of tesselation alongside it’s zellij association injects a (muted) note of optimism: it feels futuristic, technological, glowy. I doubt Dali intended to reference Islamic architecture; then again he would’ve been well aware of Spain’s Muslim past. The zellij, archway, skull surface echoing lunar all scream Islam to me which carries connotations of earned peace, practice and repetitive handmade work.

The skull here appears to signal wisdom, religious consciousness of mortality, reverence, inner exploration, armor and (due to the muted color palette) a mild warning. 

That’s all I want to say today about this painting, which is more than I can find online.

References:
Smithsonian Institution. (n.d.). Skull (Zurbarán). Smithsonian Institution. Retrieved November 19, 2024, from https://www.si.edu/es/object/skull-zurbaran:hmsg_66.1027

Israel Museum. (n.d.). Object 194792: [Title of the artwork]. The Israel Museum, Jerusalem. https://www.imj.org.il/en/collections/194792-0

Boijmans Van Beuningen Museum. (n.d.). La ville rouge / Paul Delvaux. Museum Boijmans Van Beuningen. Retrieved November 19, 2024, from https://www.boijmans.nl/en/collection/artworks/4078/La-ville-rouge-%2FPaul-Delvaux

The Art Story. (n.d.). Paul Delvaux - Biography and Legacy. Retrieved November 19, 2024, from https://www.theartstory.org/artist/delvaux-paul/

Parkinson, Gavin. (2012). The Delvaux Mystery: Painting, the Nouveau Roman , and Art History. Nottingham French Studies. 51. 298-313. 10.3366/nfs.2012.0029. 

Derzelle, E., Strivay, D., Defeyt, A., Klein, S. -J., Vandepitte, F., & Defeyt, C. (2023). Paul Delvaux: The Study of Nine Paintings by Non-Invasive Methods. Heritage, 6(11), 7181-7201. https://doi.org/10.3390/heritage6110376




Surreal Skulls in Three Conch and Skull (1944)


This Surreal Skull is in a guarded painting, difficult to learn more about. The only evidence of it’s existence online is on art auction websites.

It’s by Gertrude Abercrombie, a Chicago painter closely affiliated with The Beat Generation and she was called ‘the queen of the bohemian artists’. I confess I don’t know much about her, but it’s difficult not to fall in love with her strong visual language. Shells were a recurring motif in her work (many snails and other conch), as well as cats, eggs, flat landscapes all kind of claustrophobic insides. I especially love her very precisely rendered moons. She was happy to be called a Surrealist, inspired by Rene Magritte; stating “When I saw his work, I said to myself, ‘There’s your daddy.’”

Three Conch and Skull (1944)


Three Conch and Skull (1944) by Gertrude Abercrombie



I selected Three Conch and a Skull (1944) because I can find so little said about it I can hardly resist saying something myself. Surrealism aside, it is a strange painting because it’s very economic, very sparse. There’s some threadbare looking curtains framing a window with the moon placed like a pearl in a shell outside, in a very blue sky. There’s a brown, kind of unpleasant looking carpet –maybe its a wooden floor. There is a table covered in a beige cloth all round, holding three conch, one tall bowl with shiny black grapes and a skull.

The grapes hold my attention because they are the shiniest, and indeed the richest looking object in the entire painting. They look ripe, not overripe, fresher than everything around them. It’s interesting that they’re elevated above the shells (human head and conch) – perhaps prioritising the living above the husks thereof.

Grapes in vanitas immortalized the painting commissioner’s wealth: you’re so rich you can let the fresh grapes rot. They symbolize abundance and fertility, when they’re so inky they can echo a little mystique, some sensuality. They also evoke Dionysian imagery, you think of Bacchus and hence fun, prosperity, a little bad-ness (grapes crushed make wine, which makes good times). These ones have a particularly long stem, perhaps evoking their connection to Nature and emphasising the life therein. Gertrude Abercrombie appears to have lived somewhat sybaritically, surrounded by alcohol, jazz, musicians and embedded in art. She also said everything she painted was “autobiographical in a sense, but kind of dreamy” so perhaps the grapes are a celebration of that life.


Pixelated Grapes from my screenshot: see the shine!



Why shells, why three, why conch?

This is entitled Three Conch etc, but the way she painted these conch really look more like snails or a nautilus shell. I recently read a book about the Golden Ratio, which is echoed in most natural spirals. The conch in Lord of the Flies is used to call meetings, emblematic initially of authority, order, indeed power and voice (it was held while speaking in meetings by the speaker, something a startup I once worked at repeated with a ‘talking stick’ to enable orderly turn-based conversation). 

This is likely because conch shells have been used to amplify our voices, in architecture for secret listening points, and of course you’re supposed to be able to ‘hear the ocean’ in any seashell. The conch resembles the cochlea, our inner ear component responsible for transduction, i.e. convertion of energy from one form to another. These associations make me relate these three conch with autonomy, having a voice, using it and architecting it through painting. The affiliation of conch with speaking power is interesting, because the painting itself is quite assured, self-confident, possesses power within instead of power over. 

One of these is squarer than the other two
The conch in particular appears to be the functional, less the sensual or glamorous kind of shell – interesting considering Gertrude Abercrombie’s self-perception as ugly duckling. The conch is also very similar to the inner ear cochlea, both spiraling and relating to the amplification of audio. Abercrombie painted these very similarly to how she has painted snail shells (the conch is a sea snail, snails are slow, eaten). The conch is also spiraled, like the cochlea, spirals akin to cycles (the shell is dead, the shell is dead, the shell is dead, the grapes are alive, the skull is dead). Spirals also represent ongoing-ness, journey, change. It’s interesting how static the painting feels considering so many spirals should indicate some motion.

Inside Messages

Why three? Spirals, nature and three are all affiliated with perfection. Three in particular with harmony. While this is not a  perfect painting, it is precise, the painter appears to possess some understanding. Despite this wisdom alluded to, it is a very lonely, very empty painting: it can be lonely knowing something when you’re the only one who knows it.

Shells were used as money, though mostly cowries. These conch are painted almost larger than the human head so taking their size into account, alongside the alive grapes there seem to be messages about wealth; maybe alongside the skull it is about the richness of inner life, the loneliness of living in your head. I don’t doubt the existence of a very clear, very direct message because of the head-on way we’re looking at the objects, and how they’re presented like a collection in a museum, inviting meaning-making. I think it’s a message about inner worlds, self-reflections on mortality and decay because we are literally indoors in a room. That said, knowing there is a message doesn’t go far enough in deciphering it, she really held on tight to painting something unknowable, enigmatic.

Looks like a low poly video game skull, very Zelda-core



The skull of course is the shell of a human. If we are (kinda) our minds, then the skull encases where we imagine ourselves to be housed; what we spend most of our time in: our heads. Abercrombie seems to have a rich inner world, from what little I read about her, I sense she held a deep respect for this life, and for the lens through which she saw life and painted. The skull here may act as an anchor and of course echo mortality and death (when doesn’t it?) – but it may also reinforce how her paintings were powerfully anchored to her distinct experience of the world. Coming back to the hedonist themes in her life, perhaps the skull is painted jawless to instill stillness, inertness and finality. There is rarely a sense of motion, wind, cloud, air or movement in her paintings. If the skull had the rest of its jaw, it would probably be unbalanced and more active, if it was painted so full frontal, it would appear to grin. It is more somber because some of it is missing, which is perhaps to signal decay, finality, inevitability.

My love for the skull as a symbol is dangerous as familiarity can breed positivity of association. That said, despite the sense of sombreness, the scattered remains, the muted color palette and the fact that it is clearly night, this painting retains a strength and certainty that keeps it from being scary or sad. Certainly mysterious, occult, a little witchy, but the cartoonish rendering lends it some lightness, the moon’s fullness keeps it feeling loved, a little fearless. Returning to that moon, it is painted as though it is sitting inside a shell, which it very well could be because she is a Surrealist, by her own admission. This absurdity also brings some light, firstly because the cloud-shell is quite illuminated, secondly because pearls are generally positive, shiny, rich things and humorous to see outside your sparse living room window in the night. The overall painting is also well lit internally, despite being so muted: look at the sharp shadows thrown by the objects.

Initially I wanted to upscale ‘detail’ images, but it is charming that they look like video game scenery, pixelated. 

All in all, this is a compelling painting purely because I’ve looked at it for nearly 40 minutes, and it isn’t giving up much more than what I’ve already said. That makes it interesting, and well worth a second, third, fourth and fifth look.

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Shades of Cool (Looking for the Blues)


The etymology of cyanide comes from cyan, which comes from the Greek kyanos (dark blue, or lapis lazuli). In science, cyan- the word part is sourced from cyanogène (roughly translating to ‘blue generator’) referring to the compound molecule C2N2. Cyanide can describe compounds or ions containing the CN group. In bastardised chemistry, it can be said cyanide is produced through heating the dye Prussian Blue, which is made of iron atoms tightly bound to cyanide groups, which break down upon heating to produce the toxic gas hydrogen cyan, an acid.

Cyan is a primary subtractive color in CMYK (printers) translating as no red (00), full green (FF), and full blue (FF), i.e. hex code #00FFFF. Subtractive color spaces create color by taking light away, i.e. using color inks or pigment, and black is made by adding all 3 primary colors (cyan, magenta and yellow). In an additive color space, like a light-emitting screen, you make color by adding light of different colors so black is the absence of all color. A hex code is notation for RGB values in a base-16 system in format RRGGBB which can occupy values from 00 to FF. Cyan can be called acid blue, because its sharp on the eye, analogous to lemon’s acidity on the tongue. 

Prussian Blue is a much darker pigment with a very faintly green undertone, named so from the French bleu de Prusse because it was discovered in the capital of then Prussia in the early 18th century. Prussian Blue became iconic for its use in Edo-period Japanese woodblock prints because it was lightfast, rich and intense compared to the previously utilised indigo. Being more costly than standard, naturally produced pigments in Japan in the late 18th century, Prussian Blue signified prestige and wealth. 

THE GREAT WAVE OFF KANAGAWA (1831) by Hokusai


Most famously, Prussian Blue appears in Hokusai’s Great Wave off Kanagawa prints which later inspired Van Gogh, Degas, and Monet to use ukiyo-e compositions, flatter color, silhouette and line in contrast to the realism-laden academic approaches of late 19th century Europe. Beyond being beautiful and my favorite blue, Prussian Blue is used to treat thallium poisoning, in dye degradation to remove methylene blue pollutants from fluid, for energy storage and even electrochemical water splitting. The aforementioned methylene blue interestingly is an antidote for potassium cyanide poisoning, and for treatment of methemoglobinemia (of which a symptom is cyanosis, blue skin).

The deep sky in The Starry Night comes from Prussian Blue, likely mixed with cobalt blue and ultramarine for depth. Note the blues radiating in value, getting lighter as they approach moonlight.

THE STARRY NIGHT (1889) by Vincent Van Gogh




”Cobalt — is a divine colour, and there’s nothing so fine as that for putting space around things”

- Van Gogh’s letter to brother Theo




Cobalt blue is a lighter, less intense blue pigment made by sintering cobalt oxide with aluminium oxide, famous for use in Chinese Yuan-dynasty ceramics. Cobalt blue was rediscovered in Europe by Louis Thénard, friends with the scientist Joseph Louis Gay-Lussac who synthesized cyanogen. Thénard was asked by the French government to synthesize a cheaper alternative to ultramarine, which was obtained by grinding up the expensive precious stone lapis lazuli (kyanos). Synthetic (French) ultramarine is more lightfast than the natural and was known to Goethe as early as 1787. Ultramarine is adjectival, from French outremer which describes ‘ over the sea’ places like Afghanistan, which is where the lapis was sourced. 



“Carry me home, got my blue nail polish on
It’s my fvorite color and my favorite tone of song ”


- Lana del Rey in ‘The Blackest Day’




Ultramarine’s several famous shades include Marian Blue, used to portray the Madonna in art history, with an example below by Sassoferato. 

THE VIRGIN IN PRAYER (1650) by Sassoferrato


Another example below by Palma Vecchio hangs in the King’s dressing room at Windsor Castle.

THE VIRGIN AND CHILD WITH SAINTS CATHERINE OF ALEXANDRIA AND JOHN THE BAPTIST (1528) by Palma Vecchio


More recently, International Klein Blue (IKB) was developed by artist Yves Klein and paint supplier Edouard Adam(who’s still in business in Paris) with a special ‘linking paint’ (resin binder) preserving true pigment color. That’s why IKB is so blue (#002FA7) and curiously was identifiable by colorblind actor Eddie Redmayne, who wrote his thesis in Art History about it. IKB is also the color of all fiction book covers by Fitzcarraldo Editions with white titles text, they invert this color scheme for non-fiction.

IKB 191 (1962) by Yves Klein


Ultramarine pigment is also non-toxic alternative to the ‘phthalo blue’ (copper phthalocyanine) often used in dyeing blue polythene bags.

Copper Phthalocyanine (C.I. Pigment Blue 15:3). Do you ever feel…like a plastic bag…



Tonight’s final blue on my mind is Le Blue Asse, the particular ‘incomparable color’ of airy blue used by Genevieve Asse. I invite you to disclose to me the pigments used to obtain it, you will have my gratitude.

ORAGE (2006) by Genevieve Asse